We think countless numbers of thoughts daily so it is best to be vigilant about what you are thinking. Are you aware that your thoughts can make you feel bad and that you can direct your thoughts in a way that makes you feel good? I pay attention to what people are saying to me and there overall feeling tone as well as my feeling tone and what I am saying to others. I really notice when other people are talking negatively about something and will often stop them and point that out to them in a loving way. I ask those around me to do the same when I am in their presence. It helps us both stay conscious and aware of the present moment.
There is always going to be negativity in the world (but there is a lot of good in the world as well.) One must view the glass as half full…it feels so much better. I have had to work on my ‘head space’. There was a time when I was my own worst enemy; not now. I had my own health crisis (the inherent gift). That woke me up eight years ago but the journey goes on… there are always challenges but that is the life journey, it’s what is. Can you find the joy in it?
I love myself now so I notice thoughts that are potentially injurious to my interior space when they show up. I do not give these thoughts the space to grow and multiply; if they creep in, I am mindfully aware of them. I then choose to direct my thought to something that feels better. It is a choice in every moment. I am far from perfect but I am self aware. Catching the thought in that moment and choosing a thought that feels better is key.
Esther and Jerry Hicks wrote a fantastic book that talks about feeling states and climbing up the emotional guidance scale in ‘Ask and It is Given’. Cindy Teevens who won the spiritual author contest with her book ‘ Alchemy – How to Feel Good no matter what’ continues on with the thread. What I most appreciated about her book was her comment about how all thoughts that keep you feeling separate lead to suffering. That is so true! That is a good filter to view your thoughts through – if they cause you to feel separate (ego) choose another thought. All thoughts that cause you to feel separate automatically create suffering. If you realize that, then you can choose thoughts that cause you to feel more connected to others – those thoughts feel better to think.
For example, if I am going to a party and I think thoughts like ‘I won’t know anybody. I am socially awkward’ then how good will I feel when I get to the party? Not great, right? I am already in a state of anxiety because of what I am thinking before I get to the party. Those thoughts are keeping me feeling separate from others. What if I thought, ‘I really want to open my heart to people and find out about them tonight. I want to come from a loving place.’ These thoughts are coming from an ego-less space of connection. Feels better right?
Cognitive therapy is so important for your state of well being. It gets easier once you start being mindful of your thoughts. You can choose thoughts that make you feel bad and you can choose thoughts that make you feel good – your choice. Do you love yourself? Do you naturally gravitate to thoughts that ensure that you can’t be accepted or loved unless you do x, y or z? How about just accepting yourself in this moment because it feels so much better than telling yourself that you are not okay unless you are better or more (ego) – all the things that keep you feeling separate versus connected to others.
We all need to connect right now, to love others as they are, to accept them in their imperfection, that is something you choose (just like thoughts) and in that moment of accepting you send an affirmation to all your cells and your being ‘I can be loved despite my imperfections’ because I accept imperfections in others (which is the human condition). Now that is something that feels good. You can choose thoughts that make you feel good. Try it and let me know how it goes!