For some reason, the death of Cory Monteith has really affected me. I am almost embarassed to admit this. First of all, I have watched Glee only one time because my sister who is a big fan of the show raves about it. But after the news report of his death and my sister’s grief because of this incident, I watched a short video of a television interview with him post- Glee fame and pre-death, ironically enough. I was taken by his story because he did have a history of addictions but had had his life radically turn around in a positive direction; he started channeling his life force into a life sustaining direction, a powerful one at that>> then this accidental overdose >> how tragic. I think this story touched me so much because I had my own issues with addiction when I was young. When I was younger, I had an eating disorder. Looking back on that time in my life, I realize that my anorexia was a way to manage my anxiety. I didn’t realize that I had anxiety back then but in fact now looking back I realize this about myself. My addiction at that time in my life helped me manage my anxiety being in high school at that time and dealing with a lot of social pressures. Although I don’t know a lot about addictions, I can safely assume that we all have our own addictions that help us get through our day, might be a daily latte, a massage, addiction to technology, etc.; I assume our own addictions would not make headline news but they could. No one is immune to addictions. I feel that addictive patterns of behavior whether it be eating foods that you know are not good for you or that sabotage your ability to become healthier, addiction to toxic relationships, toxic emotions or patterns of behavior that really don’t serve your highest good are an effective albeit unconconscious way to manage something whether it be anxiety, feelings of inadequacy or whatever it may be that the addiction in facts gets rid of in the moment. The addiction serves you in the moment. The brilliant Caroline Myss says it best, ‘addictions are, in effect, a choice to remain unconscious in an age rapidly moving towards a new paradigm of consciousness’. We are all in a grand state of awakening to our divine selves. I am very conscious of how I am living my life but I am not perfect- I am very aware of when I don’t feel congruent about something because I can feel it in my gut- but that doesn’t always stop me from making a choice to indulge. As we awaken, it is harder to tolerate things that aren’t congruent with our internal state of being; our authentic selves; it becomes intolerable to our spirit. It is too bad that Cory wasn’t able to have his experience of awakening sustain him when that urge to go unconscious crept over him; so sad that this took his life. I think the message to ask ourselves is where do we have addictive behaviors that interfere with our ability to shine our brightest light and what needs to be healed so we can embrace our authentic divinity? What factors help you stay connected to your divine core and how can you bring those factors into your life on a regular basis so you feel supported when you are having an ‘off’ day or desire to indulge in your own secret addiction? Nature, meditation, conscious breathing, music, prayer, whatever feeds your soul, make time for it…and ask for help if you are feeling weak and vulnerable because we all have our human moments and we need to share in our divine humanity- we are all one…namaste.